Recovering Out Loud
This past weekend, I made a pretty big change to my appearance! I went from being blonde my entire life to being a brunette! This may not seem like a big deal to some of you, but it was an extremely drastic change for me. I had been talking about doing it for years, but never had... Continue Reading →
On October 16th, I celebrated 4 years living in recovery! I experienced a wide range of emotions leading up to that date, but on the morning of my anniversary I woke up with tears in my eyes because I felt so incredibly blessed. It’s still hard to believe I am able to live this life... Continue Reading →
I've been having trouble writing lately. Every sentence, every idea. I've had an extremely difficult time finding my words. So I asked myself, "Am I just trying too hard?" I am just going to write today, with no "goal" in mind, other than to let some of these thoughts out of my head. If it... Continue Reading →
Missing…. That one word has so much depth, and brings back so many memories. I could talk about this word endlessly as it relates to my active addiction. I could talk about the times I missed my daughter, the times I missed family events, voluntarily at first and later because I was no longer invited.... Continue Reading →
Where do I even begin? I loved alcohol. I mean, I LOVED it! I loved everything about it. I loved how it gave me confidence; that it made me feel pretty. I loved the apathy that accompanied it. I loved that I was skinnier because I was never hungry. I loved that it was accessible, acceptable even!... Continue Reading →
The #MeToo movement has caused some serious self-reflection in my life. Although I am not ready to write about the actual assault in detail, I do feel comfortable writing about the aftermath. I think... First, there are the flashbacks... I am 19 years old and I have just woken up with a stranger on top... Continue Reading →
I met a woman once, when I was volunteering in a women’s prison, who had spent the last 15 years of her life as a prostitute in active addiction. She didn’t want to be at my meeting. She was one of the ladies who was required to be there. I could see it on... Continue Reading →
Growing up, society taught me that I should not disclose that I am an alcoholic or an addict - that my addiction is something I should be ashamed of. I heard this message every time someone described another person's behavior to be that of a “crackhead,” every time someone talked about what a “drunk” someone... Continue Reading →
