Busy Brain

It’s getting busy in my brain again. I feel a storm coming on, but instead of hail it’s raining ping pong balls inside my head. This might sound ridiculous at first, but can you even imagine? My thoughts, my worries, they bounce around in there for days - ping...ping...ping - It’s a constant barrage of... Continue Reading →

Writer’s Block

I’ve been feeling like I have writer’s block lately, which is silly because I am not even sure I’ve been putting much effort into writing at all. I’ve been busy and tired and full of excuses. And quite frankly, all this friggin’ self-reflection can be physically and mentally exhausting at times. Other writers have told... Continue Reading →

I Believe in Miracles

Some days, I am just grateful I made it through. I can experience a range of emotions throughout the day - any one of which could be used as an excuse to drink - and yet somehow I choose not to. It’s a miracle, really. In early recovery, people would tell me that I was... Continue Reading →

One Addict Helping Another

I’ve been thinking about this woman I met while volunteering in prison last night. Her story has stuck with me since the moment I left. It’s devastating, humbling and it was such a stunning reminder of just how cunning, baffling and powerful the disease of addiction is. This woman had over a decade in recovery,... Continue Reading →

In Good Company

“Haven’t you had enough yet?” I can’t even tell you how many times I heard that question while I was in active addiction. Everyone in my life who cared about me had at one point pleaded with me to get help - my daughter, parents, husband, siblings, friends. The list could go on. I knew... Continue Reading →

An Inside Job

One of the most important things I've learned in recovery thus far: Throughout my life I have always been reaching for things outside of myself - hoping I would find something that would make me happy. If I could just get that job, the husband, the house, the cars, be prettier, be thinner...THEN I would... Continue Reading →

Grace and Dignity

There have been all of these moments in my life - tiny moments that don’t seem to mean much at the time - but when I stop to think about them, I am reminded how fortunate I am. Even after a painful week like the one I just had, I can still find something to... Continue Reading →

Songs of my Recovery

I was recently driving home with my daughter when Demi Lovato's new song Sober came on the radio. I had read that she had been struggling in her recovery and wrote about it in a song, but I hadn't heard it yet. Before I knew what was happening, I was overcome with emotion. As I... Continue Reading →

Feelings

“It can be exhausting - the inability to fix another human being, yet wishing with all of my heart that I could at the same time.” Vanessa Day

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