Today, I celebrate 3 years living in recovery! There was a time, not too long ago, that I didn’t think I would survive another 3 years, so this milestone is an incredible accomplishment for a once hopeless addict like myself.
If a person has never been touched by addiction, they have the ability to ignore it even exists, but when has ignoring this disease ever stopped it from progressing? When has the war on drugs ever succeeded in keeping drugs off of the streets and out of the hands of our children? The truth is, it hasn’t, because it is much more complicated than simply choosing to “just say no!”
I see what you are doing to my generation, and I have never despised anything or anyone as much as I do you. You suck the lives out of hundreds each day, and if you can’t take their life you take their wives and their children, their jobs and their homes, their dreams and their goals. You are a taker, perfectly disguised as a giver. You leave children without parents and worse, parents without children; parents who spent their entire lives trying to protect their babies from the likes of you.
“Haven’t you had enough yet?” “Aren’t you sick and tired of being sick and tired?” I can’t even tell you how many times I heard those questions while I was in active addiction. Everyone in my life who cared about me had at one point pleaded with me to just stop; my mother, husband, friends,… Continue reading Active Addiction – Have You Had Enough?
That one word has so much depth, and brings back so many memories. I could talk about this word endlessly when it relates to my active addiction. I could talk about the times I missed my daughter, the times I missed family events, voluntarily at first and later because I was no longer invited. I could tell you about all of the times I missed work, or deadlines or appointments. About the times I missed laughter and joy. I could even tell you about the times I missed myself and the person I was before my every thought was consumed by alcohol or drugs. But today, I am going to tell you about the time I went missing, in the literal sense of the word. The day that I vanished…
I wish people understood that the women who find themselves in prison are not proud of themselves. They feel shame, regret and fear. They miss their babies and husbands. They feel the judgements of society burning into their skin. Many are comfortable there ONLY because it is the only way they have stayed clean in years.
What you don’t see on the side of a liquor bottle is a legitimate warning. The one that reads: “Warning! Alcohol is an addictive substance. Excessive consumption of this beverage may cause irreparable harm to your reputation, the destruction of your marriage and family and the slow and painful deterioration of your health. It may cause you to lose your job and home, and suffer financial ruin. You may become a danger to yourself and others. Excessive consumption may also cause health issues related to: Liver, kidney and heart disease, throat cancer, depression, anxiety, neurological damage, memory loss and quite possibly death.”